Thursday, February 21, 2008

Maxine

So I got a new car last year, first one in my life.
First car that didn’t first belong to my older brother and first car I bought without having to vacuum the ashes out of the tray.
First car I didn’t find French fries under the seat along with nickels, pennies and dimes
(Actually finding loose change was a good thing)
AAAAHHHH that new car smell, still has it by the way. I can’t believe out of all the scents available for cars no one has come up with a new car smell sent, I would buy it.
Nobody better steal my idea !!!!!!!

So I didn’t realize that back when I bought Maxine I was also surrendering my right to ever spend a single penny other then gas and food.
“Sweetie I need some new jeans these are full of holes”
“ Well, let me see hummm, we did get that new car so maybe after it’s paid for”
“ Can I get a snickers candy bar?”
“ That’s not in the budget at the moment”.

I’ve been working her over for months to get the new Playstation 3; I’ve used every excuse I could, Birthdays, Anniversaries, Christmases, Thanksgivings, MLK day, Easter, Canadian Easter Day.

I abused every holiday possible “ Sweetie it’s Good Friday, can I get the PS3?
It’s Cinco de Mayo, can I get it?
Mother’s Day just around the corner……NO !
Summer Solstice day?
Independence day? First Manned Moon Landing day? ( July 20th)
Panama Canal Opened Day ? Yom Kippur ? Daylight Saving’s Day ended Day ? Pearl Harbor?
Scratch the last one I’m sure Vets (not the animal doctors ) wouldn’t like that one.
Makes me think of a joke.
How many Vietnam Vets does it take to screw in a light bulb?
You wouldn’t know, you weren’t there man.

That one might be funny only to me. Anyway, I’m proud to announce that she has finally cracked !!!!! Much to the delight of my brother Serge, I finally got the new PS3?
This time I understand that I have given up my right to buy underwear.

By the way, I should mention that I beat the crap out of Serge in our first online game of Madden !!!!!
I din't become a good sppeller overnight, I did this on Word then copied and pasted it here.

28 comments:

Jean Knee said...

Ha, I know what you mean. If I get my microwave fixed we may have to give up toothpaste and toilet paper for six months--yikes

Bee said...

Hmmmm... is there something fundamentally wrong with me cuz I never say no to Andy buying anything?

Dude, that was hilarious and Serge is gonna be pissed that you told the interwideweb that you beat him at Madden.

Bee said...

I just barely yesterday nicknamed my car yesterday and I've had it for 5 years. I'm surprised the french fry thing didn't make you happier seeing as how you like to hog them.

Marie Cordova said...

So here is a list of Dan’s recent purchases:

Cadillac STS, I drive a 10 yr old car that spends more time with my mechanic

32” HD TV, oh yeah that was for my birthday I forgot (wink)

Dish HD Receiver, because whats the point without it

Playstation 3, to go along with PS2 and all the unused games he just had to have.

Boy he’s got it rough doesn’t he?


Bee,
You don't say NO to Andy, so you can keep buying more RED things

Bee said...

Oh yeah! That's right! He has to say no to me!

Brian o Vretanos said...

My ex always names her cars, but I never have. And if I did, I'm not sure that I'd give one a female name. I don't really see cars as feminine.

I could get away without having a car at all, but I love the convenience, despite the financial drain. Though since I don't drive it much, I don't spend much on petrol.

Dan said...

Jean
Get a used one at a second hand store, the world is a better place if you use toilet paper.

Bee
Mini Tank ?

Marie
I need a car to get to work, how am I supposed to provide for you if I can't get to work.

Brian
Girls name's are sexy, Maxine is sexy. I can't picture myself saying somthing like " I'm gonna go warm up Rodger" or " Let's go for a ride on Rodrigo. What the hell is Petrol ? is that English for Gas ?

Bee said...

Dan, did I not just say I nicknamed it my Mini Tank?
Lets see, I hasn't gottent stuck in the snow, I go over snow banks with it, they ice and salt has done no damage, it has been hit twice in the back with no issues and their are no scrapes form side swiping snow banks.
All this = Mini Tank.

Bee said...

And yes Petrol is Gas. In Spanish it's Petrolio. Coincidence? I think not!

Marie Cordova said...

Yes, please keep me in the life style I've grown accustom too. And one day I too can have a new car and it's name will be Patrick

Jean Knee said...

11 th

Bee said...

DANG IT ALL TO HELL!!!!!!!!

Bee said...

just kiddin'

Jean Knee said...

dang isn't just some word you can fling around, it's serious sister

Jean Knee said...

my car is nameless

Dan said...

tell me what you drive and I'll name it for you

SC said...

Uh, no, you won by 3 points, would not consider that a slaughter. My uncle told me once "you can't win all the time, you have to let your brother win too".

I was 10 then, now much older... but I still remember his words little brother... besides it is your new toy, would not want to discourage you and beat you senseless just yet... give it a few more days...

SC

Tracy said...

Shit I just lost my frippin comment!

Tracy said...

Well, I'll try this again.
I bought my super mini van new and I think that the new car smell lasted a total of ten minutes. Kids do that kind of thing. They sucked that new car smell right out of it and replaced it with a mixture of happy meals, spilled juice, hidden old grapes, and other scents that you do not want to know the source of.
You know, I heard that the new car smell was bad for you because it was actually the fumes coming off of the new materials. Maybe you should ride around with your head sticking out the window, doggy style if you will, to stay safe.

Tracy said...

I want you to name my car!!! I drive a Chrystler Grand Voyager. It's blue.
What else?
You know, my husband is a huge red sox fan and I guess if you're a sox fan you have to hate the Yankees so I decided to love the Yankees (it's that screwing with the one you love kind of thing) and I bought a Yankee plate to put on the front. He hates that!
Name it Name it!

Bee said...

Hey! I want in on this too. What would my car be if not Mini Tank? And no chick names!

Bee said...

Maybe, since you're into Fashion, you can name it Gucci or Pradda.

Dan said...

Tracy

Bambino

This is for Babe Ruth who was once a Red Sox and got traded to the Yankees. The Redsox were cursed for a long time after that.

Dan said...

Bee
I'll get back to you on that one

Stephanie said...

FYI: They do make the tree car fresheners with the new car smell and they also make the spray car fresheners with the new car smell. If I see one I'll pick it up for you so your Maxine will always have that new car smell.

Tracy said...

Thank you Dan! I love it! And the whole back story is exactly what I need to stick it to the hubby..in the most loving of ways of course.

Dan said...

Stephanie
Cool, I din't know they made it, there goes my million dllr idea !!

Jean Knee said...

uhm. I drive a camry sedan.

it's bad ass in it's heart